I’m having my first baby — even typing those words feels surreal. It’s exciting, nerve-wracking, and something I had hoped and prayed for over the course of eight long years of fertility struggles, ever since my breast cancer diagnosis in 2016. When I finally saw those two pink lines, it felt surreal, like I had arrived in a dream. After so many negative results in the past, that positive test honestly felt too good to be true.
“As a newly pregnant woman over 40, having gone through breast cancer and countless rounds of failed IVF, I was naturally full of anxieties and overthinking everything.”
But finding out I was pregnant was just the tip of the iceberg. As a newly pregnant woman over 40, having gone through breast cancer and countless rounds of failed IVF, I was naturally full of anxieties and overthinking everything. Still, as a functional medicine doctor, I knew that preparing for the birth of my first child needed to be intentional — not just for my growing baby, but for me as well.
Now, as my baby’s arrival draws near, I can see how everything I did to get ready — both before and during pregnancy — has made all the difference. I want to share how I’ve prepared for this moment and offer some of the key tips that have helped me maintain a healthy and mindful pregnancy from my perspective as a functional medicine doctor and excited mom-to-be.
1. Prepare your body and mind — before conception.
One thing I’ve realized is that preparing for pregnancy starts long before you see those two pink lines. I kept my body in the best shape that I could, both physically and mentally, prioritizing progress over perfection. Whether you’re trying to conceive or you just found out you’re expecting, taking care of yourself is the most important thing you can do — for the both of you.
I went into this pregnancy with a plan — a vision to create a healthy environment for my baby (even during those eight long years of waiting). Prenatal vitamins, probiotics, lots of rest, nourishing whole foods, moving my body, staying hydrated, and keeping stress in check were daily non-negotiables for me. One thing that really helped me stay grounded was journaling. I used a simple, daily journal from WeNatal, which only took about five to ten minutes each day, but it helped me process my emotions and stay positive. It’s amazing how something so small can have such a big impact on your mindset.
“One thing that really helped me stay grounded was journaling.”
My husband, Charles, even commented, “I think the reason why you’ve had so few pregnancy symptoms is because of all the prep you did beforehand.” And honestly, I agree. The focus wasn’t just on my physical health — it was on creating an abundant, positive mindset, one that envisioned what my pregnancy could look like.
2. Move, even when it’s hard.
I walked outside as much as I could, even when I was waddling through the third trimester. Charles and I still made it a priority to get outside, catch the sunrise or sunset, and get moving. Even when I couldn’t put my swollen feet in sneakers (hello summer baby), we still made sure to walk. It wasn’t just about the physical movement, though.
Walking got me away from my phone, gave me sunshine, and made space for me to talk to Charles about what I was experiencing. It helped me stay grounded and connected with him and with myself, especially on the days I started to obsessively scroll for hours, searching for the very best stroller on the market.
3. Let the sun shine on your belly.
One of my favorite things during pregnancy was sitting in the sun and letting my belly soak in that light. I’d sit with my tank rolled up, exposing my skin to the healing warmth of the sun for 10–15 minutes each day (sometimes twice a day). There’s natural red and infrared light weaved into sunlight that penetrates your skin and creates this beautiful, healing energy for your womb. In the colder months, the rays came in through an open window while I sat on a grounding mat. In the warmer months, I sat outside for the experience.
“One of my favorite things during pregnancy was sitting in the sun and letting my belly soak in that light.”
Most pregnant bellies are always covered up, but I did the opposite — I exposed my belly to the sun, letting it feel that warmth and healing power. It wasn’t just good for me physically, but emotionally too. It became a little ritual that felt so good while creating a connection to my growing baby.
4. Pay attention to your protein intake and iron levels.
Food is so crucial during pregnancy; you’re taking on the role of chief dietician for you and your growing baby. Ideally, it’s great to begin your nutritional journey before conception, but it’s never too late to try to find an optimal balance of nutrients during your pregnancy.
If there’s one thing I can tell you to focus on it would be your protein intake. We’ve all heard about iron deficiency in pregnancy, but many of the iron-rich foods are also foods high in protein, so it’s important to keep protein-rich foods on your plate at every meal. You might be surprised, but increasing protein intake during pregnancy can even curb first-trimester morning sickness symptoms.
“If there’s one thing I can tell you to focus on it would be your protein intake.”
I had my labs checked every trimester during pregnancy, and when I saw my iron and ferritin levels drop, I received iron infusions during my second trimester in addition to keeping my protein intake up. Iron helps build healthy blood cells and during pregnancy, it’s so important for supporting optimal blood flow to the baby. It’s one of those simple things — protein and iron — that can make such a big difference in your energy.
To help stabilize energy levels throughout the day, I also recommend dramatically reducing sugar and processed food consumption. Fiber-rich, whole foods provided more consistent fuel for my body, while also supporting optimal digestion and detoxification.
5. Hydration, hydration, hydration.
Hydration can be challenging during pregnancy; between morning sickness and the growing intrusion on your bladder’s personal space, sometimes taking in more fluids is the last thing on your mind. But it’s absolutely critical for maintaining appropriate electrolyte balance and helping to eliminate waste. You’ll feel more alert and more energized when keeping up with your hydration each day as your pregnancy evolves.
The easiest way to stay on top of this? Keep your favorite water bottle filled and with you at all times, and make this a habit that starts with rehydrating yourself each morning, since sleep can leave you dehydrated upon waking. There’s a lot of value in being intentional around our hydration; drinking before meals or after light activity has so many benefits, and it’s important to keep in mind all of the processes in our body that we’re supporting when we choose high quality hydration.
6. Rest like it’s your job.
As much as I love my work (and trust me, I love practicing medicine), I knew I had to manage my time and energy during the entire nine months and beyond. During my pregnancy, I was also getting ready to start a new job at Love.Life, while saying goodbye to my previous one. Talk about a stressful combination! So, instead of doing it all, I focused on creating systems for both balance and boundaries. I had to remind myself when I’d pick up my laptop after hours, “You’re pregnant, and you need to manage your stress levels. Give yourself what you need.”
“I focused on creating systems for both balance and boundaries.”
I became super intentional with my work time — laser-focused during the day — but I made sure to shut it down in the evenings. I prioritized sleep and wound down each day with rest in mind. I decided I could have a literal job if I made rest my job, too.
7. Don’t stress over the baby registry.
Let me tell you — baby registries can be overwhelming. I remember feeling completely stressed out, scrolling through Instagram and getting hit with influencers and ads for all these products I “needed.” It seems like it would be fun, but it’s definitely a sneaky stress inducer! Charles stepped in and said, “Let’s just focus on the essentials, and leave it at that,” and I’m so glad we did.
“It seems like it would be fun, but it’s definitely a sneaky stress inducer!”
In the end, I’m realizing that half of the stuff on my registry probably won’t even work with my baby because every baby’s and every mother’s needs are unique and different. So, my advice? Stick to the basics — diapers, a stroller, a crib, a car seat, bottles, and clothing. Aim for clean, conscious brands that pay attention to safety and your baby’s wellness. Everything else? You’ll figure it out as you go. Don’t spend 15 hours stressing over the registry like I did! And don’t forget — a registry doesn’t have to close after your baby is born. Some loved ones even prefer gifting after the baby has arrived, once you’ve had time to consider the items you most urgently need.
8. Don’t just create a birth plan, create a postpartum plan.
While your birth plan is important, it’s still just one day (for many it can be a long one!). What’s just as crucial, if not more, is having a postpartum plan. The birth experience can be unpredictable, but your postpartum period is something you can prepare for.
“The birth experience can be unpredictable, but your postpartum period is something you can prepare for.”
While we’re on the topic of birth plans; it’s vital to speak up about your birth plan when you arrive at the hospital, birthing center, or wherever you will be delivering your baby. Make sure your OB or CNM, care team, and nurses understand your preferences, from pain management to delayed cord clamping. Advocating for yourself ensures your wishes are respected.
For me, I’ve been just as intentional about postpartum recovery as I have for the birth. Plan how you’ll rest, who will help with the baby, help preparing meals, and what support you’ll need as your body heals and adjusts during this critical time. Consider adding resources to your care team, such as a lactation consultant — one of the most crucial and helpful members of my postpartum team.
It’s okay to ask for help! Communicating with my care team and partner, Charles, about the help I’ll need has been key. Don’t hesitate to ask for support from your community or partner — it’ll help you have a smoother fourth trimester.
Some final thoughts on preparing for your new baby
Pregnancy has been one of the most transformative experiences of my life — both humbling and incredibly joyful. I’ve learned so much about myself, my body, and the power of preparation.
“Creating a plan, keeping things simple, and reaching out to trusted resources can help us focus on what’s truly important to us.”
Many of us are beginning our parenthood journey at a time when we’ve never had more information available to us or more choices to make about how we want to parent; which can be as overwhelming as it is valuable. Creating a plan, keeping things simple, and reaching out to trusted resources can help us focus on what’s truly important to us.
During my pregnancy, I took advantage of experts including a doula, health coach, acupuncturist, and childbirth preparation classes alongside my OB, to help guide my decision-making, calm my fears, and provide reassurance on my journey.
There’s still so much more I could share, especially when it comes to postpartum planning, the best baby essentials, and what lies ahead (but that might be for another post!). For now, my advice is this: Take care of yourself as best as possible — body, mind, and spirit.
“Take care of yourself as best as possible — body, mind, and spirit.”
Give yourself grace throughout the entire journey, embrace the unknowns, and trust that you’re doing exactly what you need to do to welcome your little one into the world. You’ve got this!
Dr. Jaclyn Tolentino is a board-certified family physician who currently serves as the Lead Functional Medicine Physician at Love.Life. As a women’s health & hormone expert, she’s been featured in Vogue, the Wall Street Journal, and Women’s Health. You can follow her on Instagram here.
