Brush up on these essential etiquette do’s and don’ts before your next trip to Paris.
If you want to fit in with Paris locals and avoid these travel mistakes on your next trip, certain unbreakable, unspoken codes are essential to follow. No one knows this better than Emily Monaco, who relocated to France from the United States in 2007, and who has since made Paris her permanent home.
Emily is a journalist, tour guide, cheese lover, and host of Navigating the French, a podcast that dives deep into one French word per episode to demystify French culture. She’s an expert on all the social cues and mores that make Parisians tick, in other words … some of which she had to learn the hard way. To avoid looking like a tourist in Paris, follow these French etiquette rules, and you’ll receive a French cheek kiss in no time.
1. Do say “bonjour”
Greet the people you want to speak to before you launch into anything else.
The most important word any Paris traveler needs is “bonjour,” Emily counsels. “Any interaction with anyone—be it your bus driver, your waiter, or a shopkeeper—should always begin with ‘bonjour.’ ‘Bonjour’ doesn’t just mean hello in the French language: it primes the other person for a conversation or a query. You should say ‘bonjour,’ wait for the other person to say ‘bonjour’ back, and then proceed with your request. (If you don’t speak French, the next words out of your mouth will likely be ‘Parlez-vous anglais?’ ‘Do you speak English?’).”
But don’t think of bonjour as a fusty obligation—really, it’s a key to unlocking conversations with locals. “[It] shows respect and makes the other person far more likely to go the extra mile for you,” Emily says.
2. Don’t eat on the go
Paris is not a place in a rush.
If you’re visiting Paris from a country that prizes efficient desk meals over 3-course lunches, slow your roll—time works a little differently here, especially around mealtimes. Eating on public transportation is particularly frowned upon—“I once saw some backpackers make Camembert sandwiches on the Paris Métro, and you could feel the judgment in the air,” Emily says—but even munching a sandwich as you stroll is a faux pas when it comes to French culture and traditions.
“When I was first living in Paris as a student, I was chomping down on a sandwich on the way to class, and an older man passive aggressively muttered bon appétit, mademoiselle,” says Emily. “People generally take the time to sit, even if only for a few minutes, and enjoy their lunch. If you’re on the go between two museums, you can at least find a bench or a public park!”
Related: Food in Paris: 9 Quintessentially French Dishes and Where To Try Them
3. Do keep your voice down
Indoor voice? Maybe make it your outdoor voice too.
“Fellow Americans: keep your voice down; we tend to yell,” says Emily. Sure, it’s a bit of tough love, but it helps to practice your inside voice before you hop on that flight overseas. In Paris, speaking loudly in restaurants, on trains, and in other public spaces isn’t just seen as rude—as a visitor, it’s also the fastest way to stick out like a sore thumb.
Instead, think of turning down the volume a notch or two as a sign of respect for those around you. “I would say keep your voice down on public transport, and try not to take phone calls,” Emily adds.
4. Don’t forget to ask for the check
Parisians are unlikely to hurry you out of the door.
In the United States, many servers drop the check on your table before you’re even done with dessert. Not so in Paris, where that kind of hustle and bustle would amount to a culinary capital offense. Lingering with loved ones over leisurely, multi-course meals is pretty much a national sport here, and most waiters don’t want to disturb your flow.
“No one is going to drop the check unless you ask for it, and you may feel like an air traffic controller while trying to hail the person down,” Emily says. “Remember that your waiter isn’t ignoring you; they’re trying to let you enjoy your meal unhindered. If you know you’re going to be in a rush, you can always ask for the check when the waiter delivers the last course, or you can go up to the bar.”
5. Do serve others around you first
Common courtesy is key to French etiquette.
While enjoying leisurely meals with loved ones, be sure to keep those loved ones in mind as you sip and pour at the dinner table. “Always serve other people water or wine at the table before serving yourself,” Emily counsels. It’s a small gesture of in-the-know dining etiquette, but a detail that is sure to win your companions’ approval.
The same rule also applies if you find yourself enjoying an apéro (aperitif) at a local’s home. “Don’t help yourself to more drinks at someone’s house; wait to be served,” Emily says.
6. Don’t overdress
Trying too hard, especially sartorially, is very passé.
Paris is an unabashedly fashionable city famed for its well-heeled residents. So it’s no wonder that visitors fret about the best way to “dress Parisian” before a big trip. For starters: there’s no pressure or obligation to overhaul your closet.
That said, if you want a look that fits in with the city’s vibe, think: simple—staple pieces, minimalist accessories, artfully tousled hair, maybe a quick swipe of red lipstick. If you’ve reached over-the-top levels of color and maximalism, you’ve gone several steps too far.
7. Do explore beyond the Left Bank
There’s so much more of Paris to enjoy, so venture farther afield.
Paris’ Left Bank lives large in the imaginations of visitors, all Café de Flore and Boulevard Saint-Germain; Jardin du Luxembourg and Quartier Latin; Shakespeare & Company and Sorbonne. And with good reason!
But no Paris trip is complete without exploring the city’s other highlights such as the Arc de Triomphe and Galeries Lafayette. And you’d be remiss not to spend time getting to know the local favorite neighborhoods of the Right Bank, from the boutique-and-gallery-filled streets of Le Marais to the street-art-bedecked Belleville and the too-cool-for-school Canal Saint-Martin area.
Related: 10 of the Best Neighborhoods in Paris and How To Visit
8. Don’t plan on a big Sunday shopping trip
Retail-wise, there’ll be little to nothing open in France on a Sunday.
Whether you’re looking to stock up on groceries or browse Paris’ charming boutiques, it’s best to avoid planning that big shopping trip for a Sunday. As a holdover from longstanding social custom, many shops are open for only a brief window of time on Sunday or even shuttered entirely.
And while recent modernization has seen some changes to the Sunday shopping laws, don’t expect that you’ll be able to access all the amenities and offerings you normally would (nor certain restaurants, museums, and other venues for that matter).
9. Do order the cheese course
How could you not partake in one of France’s best culinary crafts?
You simply can’t visit Paris without trying some cheese—France is home to hundreds of different varieties, after all. Follow in cheese-loving Emily’s footsteps, then, and do some sampling during your trip. She recommends visiting a local fromagerie to try everything from pungent washed-rind cheeses and piquant blues to creamy goat cheeses and grassy Alpine varieties. (Just remember that, if you’re ordering a cheese plate in a restaurant, it’s traditionally served between the main course and dessert.)
10. Don’t forget to practice your French
Making some linguistic effort goes a long way with Parisians.
As a rule, the French are proud of their language—so much so that they have an entire organization, the Académie Française, dedicated to it. With that in mind, it’s never a bad idea to brush up on some basic French vocab before your trip. Once you’ve begun with bonjour, add a few more essential phrases to the mix, from s’il vous plaît and merci beaucoup to excusez-moi and au revoir. Even if you only manage to stumble through a few words, the fact that you’re making an effort will help endear you to Paris locals who are accustomed to pushy tourists.
